would give up everytg for one moment with you , for one moment is better than a lifetime of not knowing you .

sometimes i just wished i could see through your darn-ed head . dont to this to me , just let it go .

headed mizah's crib t bake this treats for our loved ones , i already immediately had like three people in my mind . thought it was going to take longer , but it took us less than 3 hours , fast ?
was so glad that i was abled to pass them the treats , but seems like they .. i dont know .
ughhh , shall stop freting .

p.s : quit playing games with my heart .

love,
crystal embers

i hate you , i hate you , my hate for you doesnt even come close to the amount of this whole giantic universe . it's you who started this off , i tried to be nice and started textg you , im always the one startg the conversation , when was it ever you ? faking stories to other people behind my back , and tellg everyone what i do , where i go .
ouhh ehyy , here's and idea , why dont you go brodcast all my movements to CNN or sometg . God , sucha low-life .
& your so bloody selfish , i had never not share with you what ever i know , teach you what you failed to understand , and fix you up when you're broken .
but you just left me at lurch when i most needed you , despite all this i stand by you when everyone was agaisnt you , held yur head up high , afaird to make you look down and see all the horrible stuffs that is happenning . guard yur back , where were you ?
hiding behind all your so-called friends ? .

guess what ? i hate you , and get this . i dont freaking about you and yyour bullshit , or how you cover everytg up sayg you're just being straight forward , if you're being straight fowrad, why dont you f ssay it to my face ? instead of going around people about it ? fuckkk , if you're my friend , tell me face to face , and sort it out .

& i know eveyrtg fucking thing you did , rightt here 'points to head' & im not afaird to let it all out .

headed down t sentosa with the girls yesterday , the weather was like freaking haute , which set off a few arguements . Hehh , but overall , mummy & daddy ( ama & khaikhai ) kept us super sastified . The place there wasnt intially packed but it became packed a little after 5 , when the weather cooled . I had my fortune read , i can totally relate t it actually , only what she says about present seems to be worryg , but i shouldnt fret since like it all could be false aye ?

chilledchilled , then when comes shower time we had to walk a long way to the toilet and wait like an hour for only a few girls infront of us , 'screws face' anyone heard of showering at home later on ? dont have t like spa for 30 minutes inside , so unconsiderate .

anyways i had fun , despite my big shorts 'grins' and a few hiccups , i wsihed the weather dint have t be so hot . Lookg at all the couples in the water , just made me miss ___ even more , futhermore after the conversation we had the night before till nearly 4 .

amazing how things change , it takes a little bit of tryg . Im startg to , are you ?

well , yesterday's pit was superb , eventho a few pad alot of eople turn-ed up . headed down to wild wild wet , then headed down back t the pit . i found a tiny star-fish , well actually ama found the starfish and showed me, heh . It didnt move tho , blehh .

& and girl that girl actually tried t push me into the waterrr , gahhs* my hair all wet , haahs .

sorry zuzu about yur nikon ! my fault my fault . we slacked till like 10 plus ? then wanted t head home , my darn-ed dad locked me out of my house and was forced t sleep outside , amongst the other things that happened .

sleepg outside in the cold was no fun at all , headed back inside only a little after 8 am . 'screws face'

i realise i cant amke someone be there for me , eventho the person is the one i most expected t be there for me . well , nobody said that this was going t be easy at all , come what may , i'll just take baby steps at a time .

with love ,

crystal embers .

im bacckkk :)

i uploaded this vid of baby kilah , have a look 'smiles'

& i got my hands all full taking care of baby kilahhh . She's just so damn-ed cute , and she makes me laugh when im at my lowest with her forever demanding squeals .

godd , i love her .

I CALL FOR A FAMOUS 7 OUTG THIS SAT . text me , you guys know how to reach me . do come alryt .

stressg and stressg aint worth it anymore , cause im nothing when you're not with me . But this is too much , how could sometg so worong be so righttt .

say goodnight and let me go .

screw thisss , i feel so tireddd . I feel like restg my head heavily onto the pillow , with coursework every single day , it's startg to get boringg . I dont feel like talkg , or hearg to songs that has been played at least 5 times in the whole time im at art . I want to close my eyes and pray for my whole t end , this fast and competitive life we live in .

i shouldnt care for those who are not worth caring , you want this ? i'd give it to you . You're spsed to make it better , instead you're adding to it ,and you're not even tryg . screw this . Why freakg make promises when it's menat to be broken , dont find me .

I wont come findg you .

well , this week has been hectic , classes after classes . Coursework till late in the afternoon , and when i reach home all i want t do is rest my head on the pillow and drift to sleep . But , ouhh how i wished it was that easy .

had dance camp yesterday , it was super-funnay though me and mizah was the only seniors that spent the night theree . Whenn i wanted to pee , i was just about to close the door when a huge freakg cocoroach ran into the cubicle , i swear i freaking jump onto the top of the toilet bowl . & screammm . Mizahh thought i saw a ghost , HAHAHAA . stupid cocoroacah gave me a heart attack , with those legs , and they can fly onto people , ewwww .

Night time came , we did the nightwalk , i swear i feel so cruel , HEHH . me & yaya to all sorts of extends to make them scared , gahhs* but i wasnt really scary . i made a girl cry , so i wrapped my arm around her and brought her to ms.jasmine . poor thingg , then we had the movie marathon ? i watch awhile , and headed t bed . I couldnt sleeppp , talked on the phone for awhile and played wrestle with mizah for the blanket , haahs . slept after like 3 plusplus , and woke up at 6 . pfftttt , anyways overall the camp was okayy . 'smiles'

great job you guyss .

there's no point giving myself a freakg brain haemorrage. It takes some time to let you go , and it shows , cause all we know is falling , remember how, cause I know that we won't forget at all .

this is what you wanted .