meet Alfat people . neyhhs . ask zuzu why in the world she named my teddy Alfat .

got this pict in sawi's freindster , it's in pinang .


alryt, so i dint go to school todayy .
firstly i woke up darn late , & my rash was a so itchy that i cudnt help but keep on scratchg .
'Babyy wanted to folow me to the docs , but luckily he dint .
gahhh . i finished my outlines! wanted to pass it to tok guru but , pffft* i wasnt in sch .
I'll bring it tmrw thenss .

alryts , i going to blog later thens .
good bye world .

gahhh .
'cranks neck'
im so tiredddd . i cant barely think about any other things right now .
TIREDDDD .
can't wait till my coursework finishh . It's all so hectic right now .
goshh .
i must work even more harder right now .
the best aint the best , i need to be the top .
or im going to risk losing my dad .

'sighes'

im going to do my final design alrdyy .
'screams'
gahhhh . cant wait to do batik . Then im all done for now .
then can atleast get my social life on track , && focus on my other subs .
i want to go sec 5 , but i can't handle the pressure , and all the coursework AGAINNN .
PFFFT*
should have taken F&N.

I'M SORRY GFFs .
this whole week i have been giving you shit . im so stressed up .
i seem to pissed everyone of you guys kann this week .
so sorry my darlgs darlgs .


im all set for a change , im think im finally think im letting go , im so proud of myself .
it's not worth , if his going to hurt me again .
im going to concentrate like damn on my studies & my GFs .

neyhhs . && i as hell hope that kian hau would wear blue like i told him to for the S.A .
cus im going to wear blue i guess & since we are going tgher , he'd btter !
or elsee . haahs .

my cramps are so damn badd .
i was cryg non -stop ystd .
pffft*
you imagine , i just locked myself inside the room then vomit & vomit & keep on cryg .
stupid stomachh .
ughh .
this is what i get for not drinking milk .
i hate milk .
i loathe it .
i only like HL .
'rolls eyes'
that is why i dint come to school .
zuzu ! i found the eddie's song you were talkg about . heehs . funny seyy .

daddykins keep disturbg me . eeeee . he says that we are shiftg also .
&& guess what i told him .
if he wants to shift right ,
i'd chain myself to the house door .

'laughes'
i like seyy the view of this house & all .
ouhh godd . my cramps are back again . uughhhhhhh!

had dance .
hazmah was late .
we danced lyrical . i love it .
if only i was that soft .
'smiles' went to the carnival with zuzu & sabbie & sissy & freinds .
zyann stepped on my leg !!'laughes'
hell nice urhh her hugs ..
'smiles'
well , it carnival was okay .
it was pretty boring . i bet if i was the ones putting up the stalls & all . it'd be more funn .
'laughes'

saw 'PRINCEcharmg so many times .
i cant believe we were hours at the same place . only not talkg .

i swearr i can feel my heart beatg out of my boddy & my face growing red .
he's shiftg .
im doing 'Babyy wrongg .
i know if i was in 'Babyy's shoes , i'd be pissed .
im so so confuse .

i dint even look at him when i left the school .

i felt like shit i swear .


i garbbed my things , meet zuzu , && went for tution .
i dint feel like learning thoughh . dint had the mood . all i want to do is cry .
pfft*
this is how weak i am people .

&& ina dalrg . im not mad at youu .
don't worry .

yeahh common test overr !!'dances around'
ZUZU GOT FULL MARSK FOR HER GEO 12/12 .
wheewww .
teach me also urrhs??!
heehs .
fine .
i got dance todayy . ouh fshyt .
'crake her fingers bones'
i only managed to see 'Babyy less then 5 seconds just after a week .
goshh .
like hell it sucks .
it's like his there , but just a shadow . 'sighes'
I HOPE I'LL NEVER SEE EDDIE ANDIKA'S FACE EVER AGAIN .
Period .

but i cant do anytg thoughh . Pfttt*
heehs .

'rolls eyes'
went with zuzu , to wlds lamerr .
finally i get to her again like we used to .
i feel complete again .

alryts . i better go , before hazhim strangles me for not joing the game .
'laughes'

Good bye world .

yeehaaah!! i dint managed to finish my s.s properly !!
gaaaahhh.
i like last minute scribble everytg down . wahh .
i finally after like 2 years talked to atiqahh .
it felt like when we were back in sec one .
hell eyahh , i miss the old times .
haahs . i never feel awkward with her though .
im glad f7 accepted it.
we had darn so muchh funn . nyehhhs ..
she's going to sit with us tmrw .
hell yeahh . i cant wait .
&& yesterday i talked to ai lin . wheww .
im like going back to all my old time best freinds .

ouhh how i miss those those times .
i hope you guys won't mind thoughhh .
'smiles'

i miss 'Babyy cant belive i feel like we are driftg again . he's too tired , so am i .
ouhh goshh ./

wheewww
im supsed to go out in a while .
but wth .
'Babyy can wait .


so fucking stress .
force myself to study last night , while watchg closer .
it's a damn good show i tell you .
minus the stripping part .

haahs .

got to pick sab in awhile .

okays this is sooo darn boring waitg for the time to pass slowly .
i miss my mum .
ever since she started workg she's being more cranky , && lots more nagging .
i now she's doing it for us .
but i miss her too .
she quit her job at fairprice .
.she now works at town .
she works long hours i tell you .
2-10 .
then she travel back here nearly 12.

i miss her caring over me . making sure i got everytg before leaving the house .
scolding me when in come back late . waiting up fro me , when i come home after 12 .
godd i miss her .
she's the best mum ever ,
she never fails to cooks in the morning so that we got food later on .
i don't want her to go to work .
i want to be the one working . pfttt*
'tears fall on cheecks'


I MISSS MY MUMMYYY .

pffft *
'slids tiredly into chair'

big deal .
sick & tired of this .
go ahead .

feel so blehish . so big - deal .
'Babyy made evrytg better though .
if only he dint have to work .


ughh . anytg uhh .

i meet 'Babyy just now .

'smiles' everytg is sorted up .

i just don't get it you know . practically everyday mesti fight .

im sick of it .

 whyy seyy .

if im a useless piece of junk , then throw me already cann . id just dont get it .

mangkok .
dance today was fun though i cudnt get some of the steps .
phewww .
hamzah sure can shake his ass . 'laughes'
but but , the way he danced was damn HOT!.
i'm glad i came .
'smiles'
i nearly forgot that i got tuition sey . Luckily yusra reminded me .
i was already so tired && my thighs are so cramped up .
PFFT*
YUSRA DRIPPED HER NECKLACE INTO THE AIRRR!!
'laughes'

right , now i got confidence to do my maths . Zuzu catch all the rules of the triangle damn fast .
goshh i feel pressured , but heck care , i mean zuzu can always teach me kan kan kan ??!!
'laughes'
i promised myslef i won't text 'Babyy , i managed only until 8.30 seyy .
'sighes then rolls eyes'
&& he havent reply yet .
what a loser i am .
syidaaaa saw 'PRINCEcharmg , how i wish i won't hear his name anymore , or see any part of him for that matter .
'sings to self while closing eyes'
lalalal .
im still tryg to forget him .
it's true ,
people always say you'd never totally forget your past love.
im one of them . heehs .

'closes eyes'
breathes in deeply .
fuyohhh . yesterday was so gerek . minus all the nagging && hazhim locking the comp so i cant blogg!!
pffft*
HAPPY BDAE ADAM ! shessh . 20 yrs old laa seyy .
'laughes'
we went to west coast , we so wanted to go swimming urrh , but the swiimning pool at jurung close .
so we went west coast .
you cant swim there .
But there's like diff kind of playgrounds that you cant go to . mostly consist of small kids && minah & mat reps .
got this dumb mat rep anyhow hold my hand twice!
so damn pissed with him .
urhh .
then then me && syida&& hazhim && the rest of my cousin tackle this pyramid thingy .
it was like 2 1/2 high.
i was so scared , thus i was the last one to reach the top .
hazhim was so nice, he brought me all the way to the top .
reminded me of the instructors in bintan .
motivating us all the way .
then right got this small orange colour shirt kid a round 4 years old , throw sand at me !
i dint do anytg seyy! haahs . he chased me & my sis & dona all around .
me hair full of sand .
but he soooo cute !

so today went studyg with yusie & zuzu .
it'd be better if i don't 24/7 disturb them urrhs . hehes .
then met up with mizah , fiq, yana , ama, fullah .
went to eat .
so damn hungry .
kk .
i got damned dance practice tmrw .
Ilove my 'Babyy .

goodbye to the world which has grown so cold , which has so so many broken promises .
i wonder why did i stayed on till im 16 anyway .
&& i thought , that we could make it .

&& yaa so i pretended .
i pretended well dint i ? for the whole week .
wow .
people you really believe that ?
you guys really don't know what goes on in my thick skull .
fuck me .

do you know ? how it feels like pretending to be happy all the time ?
i get sick too you know .
sick of all this .
FAMOUS 7.
goshh .
'shuts self up'
'silently rocks self'
IM SICK !
all i need you to do is be there .
that's all .

KIEYS .
so atikah natasha bdae yestd was okayy larrhs .
wasnt as fun as last year though .
haahs .
sat with zuzu & khai && alan .
sumwhere far away form them
haahs .

zuzu had to go home fast .
&& i promised to sent her .
so after sending her , i met with 'Babyy at the bus stop as promised .
haahs .
he dint noticed i arrived !!
PFFFT*
'laughes'
then we walk urhhs .
but i notice he keep dragging his feet & keep looking down .
so he said , 'want to see somtg funny?"
i swear i laughed like hell .
his shoe , the whole back of it came off .
haahs . so poor thing .
i asked him arr how come become like that , he said he ran all the way from work to here .
his head!!
haahs .
so he just dragged his feet all the way till near belon house there .
then asked me if he take out his shoes & walk with just his socks would anyone notice .
well no rhyts ,
i meant it's late night then , he wearg black long pants .
so hell no . so he slipped off his left leg shoe to see if can .

something then cross my mind .
i say to him , if you take off your shoes , i also take off .
so with that , i slip off my shoes && started walkg .
i tell you his jaw dropped seyy . i guess he dint think i'd actually do that .
But i did , if he was going to look like a fool , i want to be one with him . I just want to make him comfortable .
he laughed at me . haahs . so we walked home with only socks on .
&& we keep fightg , he wants to make me wet by pulling me into the puddle . PFFT*
so baddd ! haahs . i dint succeed pullg him .
But hell yeahh he did . i was just wasnt strong .
haahs .
i enjoy last night .
I MISS MY 'BABYYY PIGGGYYYYY.
'kisses his cheeck' how i wish he dint have to work 6 days a week .

s