due to some unseen large bulging circumstances , i'll just say monday i had a blast , 'smiles sheepishly'

anyhoots , yesterday i went out again , it is really starting to wear me down , going out everyday . im like side tracking again , ermm so yeaa went home and saw my house gate was fully open , and the house was pitch black . slowly i stepped into the house as my eyes adjusted to the intensity of light in the house , only then did i make out a figure sitting on the sofa . my first instinct was to run , but i sloqly approach the sofa and pat the back of the person , darn-ed it my mum's voice made me jump sia . haahs , i thought she was possessed or sometg sittg in the dark , but when she stared nagging i know it was her .

'smiles' why she was sittg in the dark ? she throw hot water onto this lizard which hit the circuits thus blackout & and she say the lizard curse her , 'rolls eyes'

hazhim & me ask her to shussh while we investigate the damage , fortunately we got the lights on . but now we have to change the stove , haahs .

at first u made me extremely upset , cause it's so hard to see that you care , and when you do show it , it's just for awhile . but what you said has really opened my eyes , thankyou . i dont want that way , but i need yur guidance kay ? like you said , i'd change for myself and not for you , to be a better person . somehow , & u said that u love me , it was sometg i really wanted to hear for so long . so let's bring it back slowly , i love you .